Drug Thieves Must Have Been High to Steal Savings Bonds

A recent article from a newspaper in Ohio caught my attention as it linked two things that are not often combined—savings bonds and drugs. In addition to several thousand pills illegal for distribution, a would-be thief decided to try his hand at stealing savings bonds. Wow, this guy was in need of serious savings bond advice, and he isn’t the only one.

First, the story correction. Many media outlets reported he had stolen savings bonds worth $15,400. I’m not sure who came up with this. It was quick and easy to just count the face values of the bonds and, yes, it was dead wrong. Because the investment was comprised of EE Bonds, they could have been worth as little as $7,700 or as much as $50,000.

Next, the criminal correction. Dear Mr. Criminal, don’t steal savings bonds. It really isn’t worth your time. You see, they are registered securities. This means only the person(s) named on the bonds can cash them. So it may look appealing— all those $100 pieces of paper staring at you, but in the words of a popular drug campaign, “Just Say No.” It will save you a lot of hassle. Also, by stealing bonds with the owner’s name right on them you are handing the police a tracking device of where you have just been. Come on, think about it.

The morals of the story: Don’t Do Drugs, Don’t Steal Drugs, Don’t Steal Savings Bonds and if you own savings bonds Get a Bond Statement So You Know the Facts.

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